Changes in an older loved one usually come on slowly: a few unpaid bills, a near-fall, a story told twice. It’s easy to miss them until something goes wrong.
Use the checklist below to note what you’ve seen, then take it to their doctor. Spotting changes early gives everyone more choices.
What have you noticed lately?
Check anything you’ve seen in the past few months. Then save or print the list to bring to their doctor.
This is a conversation starter, not a diagnosis. Your answers stay in this browser and are never sent to IHSS Connect.
What the signs can mean
One sign on its own may be nothing. Several, especially in different areas, usually mean it’s time for a closer look. Falls are a big one: about 1 in 4 adults 65 and older fall each year. Doctors can do a quick walking test, called the Timed Up and Go, to check fall risk.
Worth knowingMemory problems don’t always mean dementia. Depression, sleep problems, thyroid issues, low vitamin B12, and some medicines can all cause them, and these often get better with treatment. If memory changes last more than a few weeks, it’s time to talk with a doctor.
FlagSome signs need help right away:
- A fall with an injury, or any medical emergency: call 911.
- Talk of death, suicide, or not wanting to live: call or text 988, any time.
- Signs of a scam, money being taken, or neglect: call California Adult Protective Services at 1-833-401-0832, open 24/7.
Talking about it
Start gently and lead with what you’ve noticed, not what they can’t do. Ask what would make things easier for them. People are more open to help they had a say in.
Driving is often the hardest talk. If a conversation doesn’t work and you’re worried about safety, anyone can ask the California DMV to reexamine a driver using form DS 699, and you can ask that your name not be shared. DMV: Potentially unsafe drivers
What to do next
You don’t have to figure this out alone. These are good places to start, in roughly this order.
- Start with their doctorAsk for a full checkup and share your list. Doctors can screen for fall risk, mood, and memory, and review every medication.
- Call your local aging agencyCalifornia’s 33 Area Agencies on Aging connect older adults and families to local help. Call 800-510-2020 to reach yours.Find yours by county →
- Look into IHSSIf they qualify for Medi-Cal, IHSS can pay for help at home with bathing, meals, housework, and more.What is IHSS? →
- Get yourself a breakRespite and Caregiver Resource Centers can give family caregivers time off, often at low or no cost.Respite care guide →
- Find a caregiverWhen it’s time for hands-on help, search caregivers near you for free on IHSS Connect.How to find a caregiver →
Sources
- CDC — STEADI training transcript (PDF)About 1 in 4 adults 65 and older fall each year
- CDC — STEADI Timed Up & Go assessment (PDF)The 10-foot walking test clinicians use; 12 seconds or more signals fall risk
- National Institute on Aging — Memory Problems, Forgetfulness, and AgingTreatable causes of memory problems; when to see a doctor
- California DMV — Potentially Unsafe DriverRequesting a driver reexamination (DS 699); confidentiality
- California Department of Aging — Find Services in My County33 Area Agencies on Aging; 800-510-2020
- CDSS — In-Home Supportive ServicesIHSS basics; Adult Protective Services hotline 1-833-401-0832
Federal health agencies and California state agencies are the primary authorities. This article is not a substitute for a medical evaluation.
About this article
This guide helps families notice when an older loved one may need more support at home, and what to do next in California. Health information comes from the CDC and the National Institute on Aging; program details come from California state agencies.
IHSS Connect is an independent, free registry for families and caregivers. We are not part of any state agency or county, and this article is general information, not medical or legal advice.
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